Missing Sundays

2012-01-08T15:25:00.003+08:00

I need to be more understanding.

I need to stop expecting for more.

I need to stop being too sensitive.

I need to stop expecting to be loved too much.

I need to stop overthinking.

I wish I could tell you how I feel about it

But I don't know how to even put it into words.

I don't want you to feel that I'm a wreck

& I don't want you to leave me like the other.

I'm sorry, Love.

2011-12-19T20:43:00.004+08:00

Zomg I haven't been blogging for the longest time!

Well quick update, I'm back from the Great Britain. Kinda miss it there now that I'm back.

It was a really awesome trip where I spent most of my time with Sissy,

which I really appreciated and I loved every moment.

It's been so long since we last did something together such as cooking, baking, girly talks etc.

Went to club over there too, not much different from the ones in Singapore. (I think?)

Anyway I've started work, and come to think of it, it's been a month plus since I started work.

I'm still surviving, which means work isn't that bad

And I still get a life.

The previous company seriously sucked so bad.

Well, it's just not easy to stay in the design industry.

So much sacrifices to make.

Quite thankful I'm in the fashion industry now, tad bit of design here and there.

I promise I'll get back up and rolling in the design industry. (v)

The folks are away in Indonesia, which leaves me alone with the annoying brother.

I'm going Christmas shopping with him later.

Whoopeedoop, SIX MORE DAYS TO CHRISTMAS!

I'm totally in the mood.

I'm totally in luvvvvvvvvvvvvvvv (though I still might be alone under the mistletoe this year!)

Alrighty, here's to wishing everyone a Blessed Merry (Rainy) Christmas

just in case I don't get back up here before Christmas.

Laters!

2011-09-11T22:06:00.004+08:00

Yay I finally got me red head!

Can you imagine me smiling from ear to ear now? ^^

I've been so much happier nowadays

despite being so occupied with work & all the catching up.

I am really enjoying this freedom!

I don't know how to put it into words but it's a really amazing feeling.

To be freed/carefree, nothing to worry about.

Nothing from work or relationships, just looking forward to Surrey & Sissy!

Zomg I can hardly waitttttttttttttttttt, barely containing my excitement.

(shrieks and jumps around)

I've gained weight ever since working there.

Just a month, and a kg gained.

Diana & Gerald's always asking me for tea break at 3ish,

imma die from growing fats if I don't stop.

The birthday's nearing, I need to slim down this fat tummy.

Zomgzomgzomgzomgzomg (freaks out)

2011-08-09T18:24:00.007+08:00

Staying up too late, losing your sleep

Started work this week, feels good to not be bumming around.

Workaholic drive is back!

Wanna look for a weekend job too

Got to save as much money before October 1st comes.

I'm really pleased with life now,

no need to say "I love you" to anybody everyday.

What a chore it is!

It's like I've come to my senses,

and I just felt that I need a change.

BIG CHANGE.

I need a change, I need a direction in life.

Most of all, I need God.

I'm gonna read up on the SIM booklets Jess took for me,

got to do research and all. Might need some advice!

And and and, I'm still looking for a branding firm to work for.

Though I can only start work in Nov!

Zomgggg so many things to be done, God please see me through!

Don't you weep

2011-08-02T18:01:00.001+08:00

Moving the fuck on and getting back my life. Not gonna let anyone/anything hold me back. There's nothing to look back to anyway! So off you go, negative thoughts and those memories. Very soon you'll just be faded memories like a fogged mirror.

2011-08-01T16:57:00.002+08:00

I'm home and really bored to tears.

Having my lunch now, at 5pm - a yoghurt & cherry tomatoes.

Can someone please bring me out?

I've been on the computer since I woke up, looking for part time jobs.

I hope I'll be hired soon!

Surrey in two months' exactly.

I can hardly wait to be away from this place

fucked up tired of everything.

Yes yes, I am being moody, again.

Run along and don't mind me.

2011-07-16T01:49:00.004+08:00

The way you've treated me the past few days/weeks,

I'm sure you did it to her, her, her, her, and her too.

Words, everyone is capable of speaking

It's just my silly thought that made it all seem like it was concern.

And maybe, affection, even.

Why did I let someone in when I'm most vulnerable?

2011-07-13T23:57:00.002+08:00

I'm feeling a little messed up right now.

Uncertainty, insecurity, sipping right through me.

I need some free hugs again tonight.

2011-07-12T01:32:00.000+08:00

I've finally decided to use cbox, again.

I don't know how to get rid of those weird viruses asking to visit the blogs

so please don't click on any of these links unless I reply them

(e.g Goldfish's)

It's the second week of my taitai/jobless life

& I'm asked to go look for jobs already.

Nobody wants me home, boohoo! :{

But there's so many things for me to do at home too.

Like...

1. Do up the room, make it look more designer-ish

2. Buy some lights & bean bags

3. Change the curtain

4. Uhhhhhh wash the fan?

5. Okay okay, I'm just finding excuses not to work

But I've still got my freelance to do...

I'm just procrastinating.

Oh Marcus is enlisting later in the morning!

Egghead bestie, take care of yourself.

(though there isn't much for me to worry about since you have nights out)

See you for some booze this weekend, bestieluv!

I'd better get some rest now,

this flu bug is really annoying the shit out of me.

2011-07-11T01:07:00.004+08:00

I HATE FLU.

I've been having flu or really serious sinus for the past few days

& it is really annoying. :{

(stuffs tissues up nose)

I feel so weak and sick now.

That explains the whininess.

I think I should start looking for a job soon.

Seeing all my friends work, they seem to have more of a life than I do.

I'm keeping my fingers crossed, hoping that Uncle would be able to

redeem a air ticket for me to fly over to look for my goldfish sister.

Blop blop blop...

Oh and yes,

Happy Nth Birthday, Sissy! (Age is a secret, yes yes)

Love you!

Oh by the way, I met up with Mo this week and he taught me how to wink.

I can't do a wink!

Okay lemme know what you think of my wink!

2011-07-08T23:39:00.006+08:00

My mood is getting better as the day passes.

Being single isn't all that tough & bad,

esp when I've got such awesome friends around me.

Texting me till I fall asleep and always being there.

I just wanna say, thank you guys. I love you all x

I'm blessed, indeed!

I remember how I used to look forward to Friday nights with you.

I remember how we used to be.

Time spent snuggling up beside you, watching telly together, lying on your chest etc.

Now I'm kinda relieved it's over.

This vicious cycle is over.

I don't want to have to cry myself to sleep anymore.

I'm done, had enough of everything I've been through.

You're not that bad a boyfriend, no one is perfect anyway.

I'd like to thank you for these 51 months.

It's unbearable, but I can do this.

I need to do this for us, for me.

2011-07-05T14:43:00.006+08:00

Life hasn't been much of the "ups" lately.

So much has happened and I guess jotting them down here wouldn't be enough

to explain or rather describe everything that has happened.

I left my job, finally.

And am taking a breather from this fast paced life.

Totally in need of a kit-kat (yes, have a break).

2011-04-16T23:31:00.004+08:00

I'm having a lot of unnecessary stress from my new job.

Not that they are pressurising me but I guess I'm just too insecure and fearful.

I feel anxiety settling its roots in me already.

I only had my first day at work!

I know I know.. I need to B-R-E-A-T-H-E.

Things wouldn't be thaaaaaat bad.

These few months would just be grinding/moulding of software skills, I got to pull through it.

Work aside.

I was glad to have met up with Yimong & Marcus last night.

Totally needed a good dinner and some listening ears.

Definitely one of my best Friday nights.

2011-04-04T23:59:00.001+08:00

No Longer.

2011-04-04T23:30:00.007+08:00

And those words just kept repeating itself in her head.

Wake the fuck up

2011-03-20T22:44:00.002+08:00

Someone should really teach me how to place a comment box in my blog.

WHY IS MISSINGSUNDAYS SO LIFELESS! :o{

Am I too boring?

Boohoo!

We are young, we run free, stay up late, we don't sleep.

2011-03-19T19:40:00.009+08:00

Graduation show is over.

I know I'll miss these folks.

Funny how these three years passed

it's so fast, I can hardly believe that I'm already done with my dip!

Ever since grad show, I've been rotting around doing nothing.

I need a job!

Although I managed to get two companies within the three days of grad show,

I am still keeping my options open

and deciding which company to get into.

I'm kinda afraid actually.

Lost & insecure, that should sum it up.

Anyway I've found recipes for macaroons online.

Might try baking some macaroons soon and quit my job as a couch potato!

I'll recommend the recipe here if all goes well!

Wish me luck!

;)

2011-03-13T21:26:00.005+08:00

Wake Up Call
After the earthquake attack in Japan, that caused the world so much distress, and caused innocent lives. It was like a wake up call for me. I felt the pain and the loss they were going through.

It's important to feel bless and thank God for protection

but it is also important to pray for these victims and their families.

To pray for God to intervene, to heal these broken hearts.

It was an additional wake up call this morning when I heard

Lincoln Brewster's "The Power Of Your Name".

"And I will live to carry Your compassion, to love a world that's broken, to be Your hands and feet."

2011-03-10T22:01:00.002+08:00

I feel so unwell.

My whole body is starting to ache so bad!

The really wicked runny nose is starting to subside

but I feel my head spinning.

2011-03-08T12:37:00.004+08:00

Angels or Devils

"This is the last time
that I'm ever gonna come here tonight
this is the last time - I will fall
into a place that fails us all - inside

I can see the pain in you
I can see the love in you
but fighting all the demons will take time
it will take time

the angels they burn inside for us
are we ever
are we ever gonna learn to fly
the devils they burn inside of us
are we ever gonna come back down
come around
I'm always gonna worry about the things that could make us cold

this is the last time
that I'm ever gonna give in tonight
are there angels or devils crawling here?
I just want to know what blurs and what is clear - to see

still I can see the pain in you
and I can see the love in you
and fighting all the demons will take time
it will take time

the angels they burn inside for us
are we ever
are we ever gonna learn to fly
the devils they burn inside of us
are we ever gonna come back down - come around
I'm always gonna worry about the things that could break us

if I was to give in - give it up
- and then
take a breath - make it deep
cause it might be the last one you get
be the last one
that could make us cold
you know that they could make us cold
I'm always gonna worry about the things that could make us cold "

2011-03-08T11:33:00.003+08:00

I have removed cbox, once again.

It's annoying the shit out of me, people or rather viruses saying

"hi, blog walking"

and yada yada.

Besides no one really reads this blog!

(prolly only chings & my goldfish sister)

I need a job. I am so not used to having nothing to do! :{

Urgh.

I'm so lazy I'm starting to grow fat from being a couch potato.

2011-03-06T23:39:00.010+08:00

"Take my photo off the wall
If it just won't sing for you
'Cause all that's left has gone away
And there's nothing there for you to prove

Oh, look what you've done
You've made a fool of everyone
Oh well, it seems likes such fun
Until you lose what you had won

Give me back my point of view
'Cause I just can't think for you
I can hardly hear you say
What should I do, well you choose

Oh, look what you've done
You've made a fool of everyone
Oh well, it seems likes such fun
Until you lose what you had won

Oh, look what you've done
You've made a fool of everyone
A fool of everyone
A fool of everyone

Take my photo off the wall
If it just won't sing for you
'Cause all that's left has gone away
And there's nothing there for you to do

Oh, look what you've done
You've made a fool of everyone
Oh well, it seems likes such fun
Until you lose what you had won

Oh, look what you've done
You've made a fool of everyone
A fool of everyone
A fool of everyone"

2011-03-04T23:46:00.002+08:00

Things are starting to work out for me.

Lect texted and asked if I'm interested in a position for visual mechandise designer/exec

so she could send my name for interview.

I hope it'll be good news!

Well let's hope the company is good too.

Don't want to get myself into some shit ass company

that makes use of fresh grads.

Town with mpy, ym and cs was fun.

We all feel rather deprieved of shopping cos we've been cooped up in studio for months.

Now we're all like unleashed and out to smell freedom!

Whoopwhoop!

Can't wait for majong tmrw ^^

Though it's gonna be a long day with two birthday parties to attend.

Talking about which, I got to wrap the gift.

I am so lazy.

ohmygawd, IAMSOLAZY.

2011-02-26T15:08:00.002+08:00

I changed my layout, finally!

And I've added in a cbox for the two noisy women to comment.

I hope missingsundays look better now!

I missed clubbing at Rebel last night.

Boohoo!

Everyone is talking about how much fun they've had and all

And all I did was finish up a bottle of alcohol within ten minutes

which almost knocked me out.

Fuggggggggggggg

2011-02-21T23:39:00.003+08:00

Yay, Yuan saved my day.

Almost died going food-less in school today

'cos I'm cooped up with my uber long list of to-do stuff in the studio.

I survived only on a milk prata and maggie goreng from breakfast

(okay I know that is A LOT for breakfast, but I was starving since 1am!)

And Yuan called me up in the evening, telling me he knows I haven't eaten and asked where would I like to go for dinner.

Awwwwwwww sweetest! (heart shape eyes)

So we headed to Thomson and I had my fishball noodle dinner at 1030pm.

Yum!

Please don't remind me about the fats from eating at such late hours.

I am so drained from all these chaotic stress, I need to swim.

I want to go shopping and pamper myself with new clothes.

I've got so much to rant but there's no time to rant it all out here.

I need to get my ass back to work, wash up and head to bed early tonight 'cos my whole body is seriously aching so bad. I feel myself aging though I'm only (near) twenty!

Laters, y'all!

2011-02-20T23:15:00.004+08:00

I had such a lazy Sunday today.

I've been home the whole day, in front of Optimus.

Was supposed to finish my design brief and journal but I kept tumblr-ing, and doing all the other junk rants online that distracted me.

But anyway I still managed to get my work done

still left with a little ps-ing before I can call it a day!

The thought of having to rush my model and cad drawings tomorrow kinda scares me.

I've got quite a lot to do and submission is on Tuesday.

God, please help me complete it all nicely before Tuesday!

Rahhhhhhhhhhhhh (pout)

Okay, I got to complete it all tomorrow before I head to work.

Then I can have a nice supper with Yuan ^^

Then........ Tuesday will be left with buying of wood base from AMK industrial park!

And Tuesday night will mark the start of my freedom.

Timbre & l4d2, yippie!

At least I got myself motivated before I'm done blogging.

Let's just hope I don't start procrastinating tomorrow.

Horighty, off to wash up and get back to work before Mom starts nagging!

2011-02-20T00:38:00.004+08:00

I am finally graduating soon.

Next week marks the end of the crazy final year project

which has dragged for months!

I am so relieved, yet I don't really want to part with this lifestyle.

This lifestyle of not sleeping early, sometimes not even sleeping for days,

eating lots of junk, coffee sessions, etc.

But on the bright side...

I get to start my swimming routine every week after next week!

I can't wait to lose some tummy fats.

Alrighty off to get some work done now!

2011-02-06T23:41:00.000+08:00

I think I make a really awful girlfriend and daughter.

2011-01-28T14:39:00.000+08:00

Don't push your luck too far, mister.

"Egos can't keep you warm on lonely nights."

2011-01-27T16:29:00.005+08:00

2011-01-27T16:29:00.002+08:00

Fyp is driving me nuts.

There's so much to do!

I'm glad I've got pretty awesome people around to guide and support me though.

But well, I'm back up here

whining

in need of a really big hug.

Why do I always have to feel this way?

Why do I always get myself in these awful situations?

I never learn, do I

Sigh

2011-01-12T20:35:00.003+08:00

It's a quarter after one, I'm a little drunk

and I need you now.

Is that a excuse good enough for me to state,

just so I can see you?

I honestly did thought of doing so that night.

I wasn't drunk

But I just wanted to see you.

2011-01-09T18:57:00.004+08:00

Okay Shann, breathe. It's just another phrase in life.

2011-01-09T18:57:00.001+08:00

I feel feverish. :{

2011-01-01T13:10:00.002+08:00

I don't know why my heart is aching

It's the new year and I'm home doing up my fyp.

Can someone nice bring me out please?

I think I need to get out for a breather.

Prolly I'll go for a swim or a run later.

Sigh

2010-12-31T22:19:00.002+08:00

It's so fast, 2010 is ending.

I've yet to prepare, to embrace 2011.

Hopefully all the shit I've been through wouldn't follow me through the next year.

This year hasn't been easy.

I've cried but still,

there were the happy moments that I've got to thank God for.

In fact many things or rather blessings in disguise

such as the people who came into my life this year,

people who changed me, guided me, doted on me, be there for me.

I thank you all :)

Alrighty, back to fyp.

Haps new year, y'all!

2010-12-29T22:00:00.001+08:00

We're not the same, dear, as we used to be
The seasons have changed and so have we
There was little we could say and even less that we could do
To stop the ice from getting thinner under me and you

We buried our love in the wintery grave
A lump in the snow was all that remained
But we stayed by its side, as the days turned to weeks
And the ice kept getting thinner with every word that we'd speak

When the spring arrived, we were taken by surprise
When the flows under our feet bled into the sea
And nothing was left for you and me

We're not the same dear and it seems to me
There's nowhere we can go with nothing underneath
Then it saddens me to say what we both knew was true
That the ice was getting thinner under me and you

The ice was getting thinner under me and you

2010-12-29T21:49:00.002+08:00

Always.

2010-12-29T21:45:00.002+08:00

Sitting in front of Optimus, slogging hard for fyp,

nose dripping like a running tap

shoulders aching

alone at home

no snacks to munch on

Conclusion: Not good.

2010-12-26T19:33:00.007+08:00

Love, love is like a stubborn youth
 That you'd rather just deny
 I'm walking on a broken roof
 While I'm looking at the sky

It's all false love and affection
You don't want me
You just like the attention
Yes it's all false love and affection
You don't like me
You just want the attention

I'm not your toy
This isn't another girl meets boy 

Love, love hides in a smoky light
And I can never find the truth
Boy, your touches leave me mystified
And I wish I could believe in you

Yes it's all false love and affection
You don't want me
You just like the attention
Yes it's all false love and affection
You don't like me
You just want the attention

I'm not your toy
This isn't another girl meets boy

It's all false love and affection
You don't want me
You just like the attention
Yes it's all false love and affection
You don't like me
You just want the attention

I'm not your toy
This isn't another girl meets boy

2010-12-26T18:23:00.008+08:00

On the second day of Christmas...

Met up with the awesome people again!

Unfortunately, dear Sean has got the flu.

But nonetheless, it was a pretty nice meet up with the ramen and shopping.

I'm off to get some work done.

Have an awesome boxing day!

I missed you.

Much Love,

Shann

2010-12-24T22:18:00.005+08:00

It's Christmas eve.

I spent the past few minutes or maybe hours reading my old posts.

And I realised I'm one fortunate girl

Despite all that heartbreaks I went through every year,

I had someone there for me.

Reading those posts really made me feel nostalgic.

And then I'll start to think, "Did I make the right decisions?"

But then again, it's pointless now rigggggggght

Alright, negative thoughts aside.

Blessed Christmas eve y'all!

Much Love,

Shann

2010-12-24T17:37:00.000+08:00

I feel your heart cry for love,
But you won't let me make it right.
You were hurt, but I decided,
That you were worth the fight.
Every night, you lock up,
You won't let me come inside.
But the look in your eyes,
As I can turn the tide.

In your heart, in your heart, in your heart,
I can tell you can fit one more.
In your heart, in your heart, in your heart,
I don't care who was there before.

I feel your heart cry for love,
Then you act like there's no room.
Room for me, or anyone,
"Don't disturb" is all I see.
Close the door, turn the key,
On everything that we could be.
If loneliness would move out,
I'd fill the vacancy.
In your heart, in your heart, in your heart,
whhoooooooo
In your heart, in your heart, in your heart.

This ain't the Heartbreak Hotel,
Even though I know it well.
Those no shows, they sure tell,
In the way you hold yourself.
Don't you fret, should you get,
Another cancellation.
Give me a chance I'd make a,
Permanent reservation.

In your heart, in your heart, in your heart,
I can tell you can fit one more.
Open up make a brand new start,
I don't care who's stayed before.

I feel your heart cry for love,
Then you act like there's no room.
Room for me, or anyone,
"Don't disturb" is all I see.
Close the door, turn the key,
On everything that we could be.
If loneliness would move out,
I'd fill the vacancy.
In your heart, in your heart, in your heart
In your heart, in your heart, in your heart.

When I, talk to you, on the phone,
Listen close.

I feel your heart cry for love,
Then you act like there's no room.
Room for me, or anyone,
"Don't disturb" is all I see.
Close the door, turn the key,
On everything that we could be.
If loneliness would move out,
I'd fill the vacancy.
In your heart, in your heart, in your heart,

2010-12-21T18:22:00.001+08:00

I think this love is slowly killing me.

Hate to be crying every night

2010-11-24T22:56:00.001+08:00

I'm up on twitter, like finally d'oh!

YIPPIE.

2010-11-22T13:27:00.002+08:00

"The rain falls on my windows
And the coldness runs through my soul
And the rain falls, oh the rain falls
I don't want to be alone

I wish that I could Photoshop all
Our bad memories
Because the flashbacks, oh the flashbacks
Won't leave me alone"

2010-11-19T15:54:00.002+08:00

I feel terrible, someone please bring me out shopping?

And I want to chop my hair shorter.

Sigh!

2010-10-29T12:10:00.001+08:00

I know, it's gonna get tougher.

I will survive.

2010-10-22T16:29:00.003+08:00

Sometimes words just can't help to express...

These are my thoughts today.

Fucked as always.

2010-10-13T09:26:00.002+08:00

I'm back with again, one of the moodest mood.

I hate feeling like a punching bag.

2010-10-07T15:40:00.002+08:00

I wish I could be back carried,

just to feel the warmth on your back.

2010-10-05T22:50:00.003+08:00

I'm so so so so happy, words cannot describe my excitement!

I can't seem to stop smiling.

I know I look stupid, but who cares.

I'm damn happy!

Thank God!

2010-10-01T02:03:00.003+08:00

Nothing beats being wrapped up comfortably in bed now.

2010-09-17T23:47:00.003+08:00

I love eating pancakes!

I love making pancakes!

I guess I'll soon love serving pancakes!

Catch me @ Strictly Pancakes!

Can't wait for the official opening on Sunday ^^

(shrieks)

I tried making my first chocolate pancake today.

And it's just so cute!

Shall upload pictures soon.

Thanks K, for being such a joker and making me laugh so bad.

And cheering me up :)

2010-09-14T12:23:00.002+08:00

It is what's happening that's scaring me.

And it is the thoughts that are killing me.

Do you know that?

2010-09-08T17:51:00.006+08:00

Expressing - true to self

It's tiring to try to be another to please others.

After all we can't please everyone, can we?

If we're fragile, then we are.

Everyone's fragile, in fact.

I'm weak, and am afraid of being alone.

But it doesn't matter because I know I'm not the only one feeling this way.

So run along now and stop haunting me.

2010-09-08T11:48:00.007+08:00

Note to self: Learn to float.

2010-08-18T12:11:00.002+08:00

I'm tired.

2010-08-17T14:48:00.006+08:00

The trick is to keep breathing

Just breathe
Its not like your dead
If you'd only look around, you'll see the beauty of this world
Just live
We ain't got lots of time
The endless sand's rushing through the contours of the hourglass
We ain't got lots of time

Live your life
Don't let anyone tell you that your not good enough for it, oh
Take a step
Cause it wouldn't hurt you please believe me
You've got me right here
Right here by your side

Break free
These shackles have to go
Courageous, spontaneous
We'll make it through this time
Brace up
This road's gonna be rough
Endurance, patience
We'll make it through this time

2010-08-15T22:44:00.002+08:00

"Take my five loaves and two fishes

Do with it as you will
I surrender
Take my fears and my inhibitions
All my burdens, my ambitions
You can use it all to feed them all"

2010-08-11T16:14:00.000+08:00

Remember to breathe

Mid crit is finally over, it isn't exactly a relief to me.

Not yet.

I've got to start working hard, thinking hard,

or else I'll just be wasting my time and be called a science teacher again.

Sigh!

Time to buck up and learn more from Aiai.

Aiai, thank you for always being there

and playing your part as my best girlfriend :)

2010-08-08T23:31:00.004+08:00

The lovers, the dreamers and me

Picnic with the awesome-est people brings such great joy.

Totally enjoyed our kite flying and makan session at barrage ytd!

I want to go get a Batman kite!

Did the usual Sunday stuffs.

My dear Junhee is growing up so fast and he is so so adorable!

Today he played my iphone till he dozed off.

Awwwww

2010-08-06T15:14:00.003+08:00

My first kiss went a little like this

Life just keeps getting better, doesn't it?

Picnic with awesome company tomorrow!

Can't wait!

(shrieks)

2010-07-29T23:45:00.003+08:00

I wish I never heard those things concerning you.

Things I had never expected to hear.

Now I don't know how

I don't look at you the same way anymore.

I wish I could just take it all lightly.

Pretended I heard nothing

But anyway it doesn't really concern me.

I wish I had the ability to change

both you and all these bad rumors.

I wish I didn't care that much for others, even you.

I wish you're not what I heard you to be.

I wish you could be more open, true and straightforward in this friendship.

Now I wish I can put it all aside and salvage this whole friendship.

I'll give it my best anyway.

2010-07-26T12:48:00.006+08:00

"Tell them all I know now
shout it from the roof top
write it on the sky love
all we had is gone now
Tell them I was happy
and my heart is broken
all my scars are open
Tell them what I hoped would be
impossible, impossible"

2010-07-20T13:26:00.004+08:00

Hi, is this the circus?

This morning, I spent my whole bus trip watching the world outside.

It's interesting to observe other people...

Mmm and it got me wondering why we'd swing our arms as we walk.

It felt as though I was watching a disorganised marching band early this morning

marching along the pathways as my bus passed by.

Everyone's swinging their arms, in a somewhat similar rhythm.

I don't know but I'm still amused.

Well I swing my arms too!

Haha

2010-07-14T12:44:00.001+08:00

"We're not the same, dear

As we used to be.

The seasons have changed and so have we.

There was little we could say,

even less that we could do

To stop the ice from getting thinner

under me and you."

Maybe I really am changing...

Or maybe I'm just jaded.

No, I'm not ready yet.

2010-07-10T11:17:00.003+08:00

I need some me-space.

I need space for myself to breathe.

I don't want to be pressurized in any of these thoughts,

thoughts of which decisions to make,

thoughts of the past,

thoughts of the future,

thoughts of whoever.

Period.

2010-07-09T14:38:00.008+08:00

The words you scribbled on the walls

I want to catch Myles Kennedy & Coheed and Cambria during Slash's concert!

But it's 98 bucks (early bird specials)

I'm in a dilemma :{

2nd August, 730pm @ Fort Canning Park.

I don't want to get bitten by mosquitoes

but the thought of Myles Kennedy's voice...

(melts)

2010-06-12T09:40:00.004+08:00

Everybody's Changing

Today I realised that "sorry" isn't the hardest word
"Goodbye" is the hardest.
I still can't bear to let go.
I really dread changes.
It took me so long to actually say bye.

December please hurry come.
I miss you already, Sissy!

2010-05-10T16:57:00.003+08:00

If everything could ever feel this real forever

I haven't been in the best of moods lately.
I feel so deprived of sleep and play.
I want to go kite flying
someone please bring me go kite flying
:{

2010-04-29T23:04:00.007+08:00

It ain't right to just love me when you can

I am getting rounder day by day :{

The event people are starting to call me fishball face.

And to make it worse, I just had a big plate of chicken bryani.

But it was just sooooo good.

Irresistable. Mmmm yummm

That day during event I even asked the guys to get me wanton mee add mee.

Gawddddddddd

I got to stop being greedy.

I shall try...

2010-04-17T15:45:00.002+08:00

I'm finally spending some time with Optimus.

I've been so damn busy since attachment started.

Don't ask me how is it unless you don't mind listening to me rant and whine.

I've been koi-ing every week.

It's my only dosage to all the things going on now

I'm totally flustered.

Rahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

Fashion show @ ion tmrw.

So I don't exactly have an off day this whole week.

Anyway you guys should check out Vigilantcitizen's new article on "The Imaginarium of Doctor Parnassus".

It's awesome.

Alrighty off to catch some sleep in this rainy weather!

2010-03-24T21:20:00.005+08:00

My results woke me up yesterday morning.

And, I was pleasantly surprised.

I improved! Yay!

But I've still got a lot more to buck up.

Went to Timbre w Mpy, Ym, Marky, Ah hui & Kj last evening.

It was a really nice, simple dinner.

We had four pizzas. four, four pizzas!

I gave up my erdinger halfway. (Not even halfway, actually)

Bloody annoying.

I was starving and gobbling food down my throat, almost literally.

Haha.

My intern company called me this morning

they were asking for my o level cert, poly transcript, ic and portfolio.

Seems like they are expecting a lot from us.

I am so worried!

I hope we'll get through the interview successfully.

Oh anyway my blog's dying.

(Okay, like d'oh)

It's easier for me to tumblr now.

Blogger's only possible when I use Optimus.

Rahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

2010-03-19T12:42:00.003+08:00

But when it comes to you, I can't decide

I haven't been blogging much recently.

I've been pretty busy hanging out w Dyfed & friends.

And I'm staying home today

basically 'cos I don't have plans and I got to pack my room.

I want to have wanton mee + frolicks + iced milo + koi.

Who wants to bring me out?

2010-03-09T23:25:00.003+08:00

Hello Dyfed, Optimus is very happy to have an addition to the family.

And look I got matching wears for them both!

Awwwwwww...

2010-03-06T21:11:00.008+08:00

Went to watch "Alice In Wonderland".

Awesome storyline though there were very strong occultism

throughout the whole show.

Nonetheless, it was worth the watch.

Partially due to Matt Lucas being in it.

I'm always amused by Matt Lucas' jokes and expressions.

My all time fav british comedian!

(If you don't know Matt Lucas, he's the fat boys in Alice in wonderland)

;)

Anyway something random but,

how do you exactly reply when people ask you

"What's up?"

'Cos I often get such questions.

And I honestly do not know how to answer them.

Like, what's up?

Do you actually mean how's life?

But what's with "what's up".

Hmmm.

2010-03-04T23:03:00.004+08:00

I stomped into my brother's room

and the first thing he said was,

"What is that you're wearing? You look fat."

What the fuck.

2010-03-03T22:15:00.005+08:00

Oh darling, I wish you were here

I'm finally back on blogger!

I've been nua-ing a lot since the holidays started.

Well I'll post some pictures to sum up the days I haven't been blogging.

Stayed home and baked muffins with Shasha today

I'm going for another photography session tmrw, yay!

Little Guiling's gonna be fun :)

Oh and I've been eating a lot.

Nothing unusual but I'm getting rounder.

Shann, please stop.

2010-02-23T22:34:00.006+08:00

Say it again, for me

Day spent on the railway tracks around Upper Bukit Timah area.

It was a really tiring but fun and adventurous trip!

Best of all was the company :D

I can't wait to get my golden half and holga and blackbird fly soon.

Oh and I finally bought the canvas bag from Cat Socrates today.

It's so pretty and casual.

Time for my gucci to take a break and hello, canvas clown!

2010-02-21T23:19:00.001+08:00

We share a certain stillness

Meet my favvv boy!

He's such a sweetie.

When I asked to kiss him, he moved his cheeks near to me to kiss him.

And we played/taught him his ABCs. :D

The usual Sunday dim sum with grandparents.

Very yummmmmmmmy!

The sky this morning, for you, Yimong :]

2010-02-21T00:21:00.002+08:00

Another day goes by
And nothing changed, he's still the same
I can hear her cryin'
Thinkin she's the one to blame
Will this ever end?
Will this house be a home again?
If I had my way
I'd corner him and say

Put yourself in her position
All she needs is recognition
Love's not enough when you say it
Don't you know you've gotta mean it
Screwin up the best thing ever
Is something you'll regret forever
Take her and make sure she feels it
Let her know you'll never let her go

2010-02-20T23:14:00.003+08:00

You're still the same after all.

Still as selfish.

Why'd I bother trying?

It's not like you're giving your best.

Lies, I hate them.

2010-02-20T11:48:00.002+08:00

I got to buck up on my strokes!

I can't get it right, got all rusty already.

Damn.

Off to bainian at Bestie's and company her study

Good day y'all!

2010-02-20T00:01:00.004+08:00

Why cry

It's confirmed, IAP starts on 5 april for us.

Seems like Sid0802 has got to push forward our Redang trip.

I feel so afraid for IAP

Worked for a fashion show event today.

The models were all gorgeous and the hostess, Diana is so so hot.

I'm so tired though I didn't do much.

And I'm going to swim with Bestie tmrw

Yippie, time to swim and get my mind off stuff.

I like people to read my mind :]

2010-02-19T00:15:00.003+08:00

Over at Mpy's place after sending Rosti off w the clique.

It's been a while since the clique hung out together.

Anyway I lost moolah from playing black jack.

Baddddddddddddddd

And I must buck up on guitar/band hero.

These thoughts need to stop.

No way am I going to let it suffocate me.

2010-02-15T02:23:00.003+08:00

Happy lunar new year & belated valentine's day to all!

I slept a lot today.

I was practically eating, sleeping, doing my cny greetings the whole day.

Oh and I had my fav Java Chip Frap today (finally, after so long)!

Hung out till about twelve and I headed home.

2010-02-12T23:48:00.000+08:00

Say that you will never let it go

I am awake for more than 30hours already.

I stayed up the whole night doing up my model

I'm so glad I'm finally done & over with it!

Yay, byebye year2!

This two months break MUST be spent wisely

I shall enjoy myself as much before yr3 starts.

So people, meet me up soooooon.

I am sooooo exhausted.

And I've got work tmrw at 830am

So off to bed "nao", goodnight!

2010-02-11T03:57:00.000+08:00

Cannot, must sleep. Now.

I am sooooo sleepy

I'll be back in four hours' time!

2010-02-10T22:20:00.005+08:00

Look Mom, you don't even touch the kitchen.

Like not at all.

Quit playing like we treat you like the maid.

Telling everyone that, making yourself feel so pathetic.

But we all know that's not true.

Even Dad has nothing to say when I stared at him after you kept trying to find things to say about

you gg crazy cos you do everything at home and the kitchen being dirty.

Whenever Sissy & I bake/cook, we always do the cleaning up

Since when do you do it?

You claim working and doing housework is so tiring for you

and one day you'll go crazy.

But wait, you don't work everyday

and housework = laundry, iron the clothes & sweeping of floor(mostly your room & the living room only).

What else?

I can find mothers of friends' who work, and they have to come home to

prepare meals and do literally all the housework.

So don't tell me those mothers have gone crazy already.

You would have gone crazy if you were me then.

I've got two jobs, and I'm studying. I sweep the floor too.

And honestly, I mopped the kitchen floor so many bloody times today

(to be specific, I mopped twice, Bestie mopped thrice, so in total that makes in five times!)

and now you claim it's still oily/sticky?

C'mon, who are you lying all these too?

Are you certain that the floor is oily/sticky?

You're just finding something to flare up about, isn't it?

You complained to Bestie once that I don't spend time with you

but look, I can't help but stay away from you when you're always this cranky.

Urggggggggggggggggggggggg.

2010-02-09T21:01:00.000+08:00

Me Again (Uncle Kracker feat Jesse Lee)

Hey it's me, again
I'm just checkin' in
Wonderin' how you've been
Yeah it's been awhile
Nothin' much has changed
I hope you're doin' okay
I just called to say
You've been on my mind

And I hope the next time you fall in love
You get everything you've been dreamin' of
You deserve a happiness that sees no end
But next time you fall in love
I hope it's with me again

Well baby I could lie
Say that I'm doing great
Truth is I miss the way
I feel when I'm with you

And I hope the next time you fall in love
You get everything you've been dreamin' of
You deserve a happiness that sees no end
But next time you fall in love
I hope it's with me again

Cause you and I were never meant to be apart
What we had is better than where we are
I promise that I'll never leave you in the dark

Baby I miss you

Yeah, I hope the next time you fall in love
You get everything you've been dreamin' of
Yeah, I hope the next time you fall in love
I give you everything you've been dreamin' of
I'll give you a happiness that sees no end
The next time you fall in love
I hope it's with me again
Me again

2010-02-08T04:20:00.002+08:00

This post is gonna be a whiny one so just bear w me pleasssssssse...

I'm sill awake.

I'm starting to daze, buay tahanzzzz!

I'm going to sleep soon.

My face is totally expressionless now, like this ._.

My back is aching.

Five more days.

No wait, FOUR MORE DAYS.

I smell freedommmmmmm.

I am so deprived of play.

I'm getting hungry.

I need a massage.

I need tlc.

Breather please!

2010-02-06T00:06:00.008+08:00

Fast Forward

I am such a happy girl now.

'cos I had a really awesome friday evening/night with the ladies.

I didn't expect the place to be soooo pretty and fun!

To all, do check out Nabin's.

My new favvvv hangout place. C:

Timbre's still one of my all time favvvv, no worries.

Hehehehehehe

So we drank, ate, watched this hot belly dancer, stayed for the magic show, had our girls talk

and... baby sit.

Doc's two little princesses are really adorable but naughty too!

I'm like their couch, they love sitting on my lap.

I still love them anyway :D

Alrighty, enough of fun.

Back to school work!

And yes, I'll head to bed once my nose starts running again.

2010-02-01T21:52:00.005+08:00

"I'm so sick and tired of being sick and tired"

School has been really awful.

Not only for today, but everyday now.

(Today wasn't thaaaaaaaat bad 'cos I had my fav cupcake again.)

I've got so much to do!

Deadline's on 12th Feb and I've still got these to do...

1. Perspective views on rhino

2. 6 bloody mockups

3. Autocad drawings

4. Pboards

5. Report

6. Model

And that's for studio.

I've got another report to do for Aip.

I've got lighting plan to do for environmental.

I'm dyinggggggggggg

I want to go on sleepless but my flu wouldn't allow me to.

It's back again, this time with a headache.

My head feels so heavy.

I'm getting pretty frustrated and cranky over myself and my work progress.

And it's also making me emotional.

Someone needs to bring me out to take a breather.

2010-01-31T12:36:00.004+08:00

Again...

"要学会为自己而活".

I know this is so not me but but but

I saw a friend's post on that.

It's like soooo true and something that I got to drill in my head.

Maybe that's why it's appeared to me, again!

2010-01-30T23:49:00.001+08:00

It felt like I got shot by reality when one of my close friend said,

"Live your own life. For yourself."

It got me thinking...

Who have I been living for?

Who was it that made me wake up, loving each day?

Why, I've been living my life relying on you, on everyone - my wonderwalls.

It's time I have some me-time and start being more independent.

2010-01-25T23:51:00.007+08:00

Tell me I'm not just being silly again

My monday blues were chased away by these little things.

(Chocolate muffin & Bloody Beetroots, lovvvvve)

: >

I was just way down last night.

You know the kind of feeling...

when you feel so empty, so alone

and wished someone was there.

but no matter how many people are there comforting you,

it still doesn't make the feeling go away

'cos that special one isn't near.

Okay why am I saying all these?

I sound so silly and retarded.

Anyway if you'r really bored,

go check out http://vigilantcitizen.com.

This guy is really interesting, but if you're timid, don't read his articles.

Not for the weak hearted.

I want to watch so many movies nowwwwww

Legion, Tooth Fairy and The Imaginarium of Doctor Parnassus.

So I gotta rush my assignments and I'll be able to catch all of these shows.

Who's in it with me?

2010-01-24T21:54:00.002+08:00

I had two large bowls of porridge for dinner.

Now I'm bloated.

Please stop feeding me fat, Sissy :(

I love food but that's not the wayyyyyyyyyyyy.

Nooooooooooooooooo (screams dramatically)

2010-01-23T22:01:00.009+08:00

Because it takes two to whisper quietly

I cooked dinner today. (with Sissy guiding me though)

But I am still so proud of myself. (beams)

Yay!

Spent my Saturday morning snoozing in bed.

And I was made to wake up to go Little India with Ym for site analysis.

The weather was such a killer

I swear I didn't even want to spend much time at the backlanes!

Thank God for my favvvvvvv A.B.Mohamed

or else I would have been a grouchy girl the whole day.

2010-01-22T21:14:00.003+08:00

We shared the same love

I wonder how you've been, and...

I miss you.